I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
This beer is not sobering me up at all
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism