Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Need sex. Gaining weight.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
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