God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
