Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
