I just saw a hot homeless man
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
