we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
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I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
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I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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