my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
NoShamevember. You game?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
