Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid