Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
You left your phone here
Wait...
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize