just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
