I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
