My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
