Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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