I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
