Little spoons don't ask big questions
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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