i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
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