i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
