I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
