So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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