Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize