Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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