Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Randomize
