I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
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