I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
