Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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