Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
