ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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