Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
