Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
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