1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
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