I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
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