For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
third nipple confirmed
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Terrible idea I love it
Randomize
