I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
