You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
