Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
