don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
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Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
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I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
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