If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
17 year olds will be the death of me.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I enjoy the company of your penis
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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