Texts From Last Night

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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke

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  (519): I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke http://tfl.nu/3o1y
  Replies (50) Good night (1320) Bad night (2837)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Hawaiian shirts and no dignity

  (1-908): View more from New Jersey

  We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.

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  (908): Hawaiian shirts and no dignity (1-908): We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie. http://tfl.nu/mjtt
  Replies (6) Good night (2501) Bad night (696)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.

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  (781): I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket. http://tfl.nu/zypb
  Replies (51) Good night (815) Bad night (4683)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day

  (240): View more from Maryland

  hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine

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  (301): i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day (240): hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine http://tfl.nu/f8k7
  Replies (10) Good night (4269) Bad night (1019)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex

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  (978): i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex http://tfl.nu/k76b
  Replies (5) Good night (4150) Bad night (882)
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  (559): View more from California

  I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.

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  (559): I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing. http://tfl.nu/i8zl
  Replies (6) Good night (5509) Bad night (1695)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.

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  (239): so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are. http://tfl.nu/bpgx
  Replies (15) Good night (3407) Bad night (1130)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.

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  (215): He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule. http://tfl.nu/c0gm
  Replies (11) Good night (3146) Bad night (1403)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.

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  (816): It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions. http://tfl.nu/dx67
  Replies (5) Good night (1500) Bad night (704)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?

  (810): View more from Michigan

  shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you

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  (907): I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone? (810): shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you http://tfl.nu/u0b0
  Replies (14) Good night (2419) Bad night (778)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand

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  (410): Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand http://tfl.nu/h8jq
  Replies (3) Good night (1560) Bad night (412)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...

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  (443): I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ... http://tfl.nu/71on
  Replies (1) Good night (278) Bad night (560)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.

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  (520): Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband. http://tfl.nu/8kmu
  Replies (2) Good night (348) Bad night (676)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.

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  (231): Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it. http://tfl.nu/zdq2
  Replies (0) Good night (450) Bad night (153)
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  (716): View more from New York

  Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....

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  (716): Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee.... http://tfl.nu/ar4i
  Replies (2) Good night (269) Bad night (393)

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