i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
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I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
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Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?