I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
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So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
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this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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