just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
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