She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Randomize
