Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Randomize