I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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