We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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