just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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