I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
