i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
