I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Randomize
