this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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