Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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