Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize