put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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